Changing a Child’s Last Name in Divorce

My (soon-to-be) ex-wife is changing my sons name in school (and who knows where else.)

Changing a Child's Last Name in DivorceQuestion:

My ex-wife and I are in the process of a very high-conflict divorce with a ever-changing custody battle over our 6yr old son. During the beginning of the process, my ex dropped my last name and retained her maiden name. We have joint legal custody of my son though. Unbeknownst to me, she has been having my child referred to at school by her maiden name. The child’s middle name is her maiden name, but the name is not hyphenated. Today, during a conversation about something else with my son, he openly told me that he goes by either her last name at school or the two names as if they were hyphenated. He even believes that her maiden name is his last name. I explained tried to explain to him the difference but at the moment he spends the majority of the time with her. I’m concerned she’s seriously confusing the child with this and I did not agree to any nor condone ANY of this. There is absolutely no conversation between her and I and trying to get any details from her about school or anything is impossible. I have been trying to get a conference with the school about our son but it was a process due to her lying, telling them i wasn’t allowed to be around him or have access.

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Answer:

If you have an attorney, speak with your attorney to address this issue. Your son’s name remains as it was (he keeps your last name) unless there is an application to court seeking to change his name. If you do not have an attorney, you need to either consult with an attorney or address this issue yourself in court. If a divorce action is pending, you will have to address this with the Supreme Court judge by filing a motion. If there is no divorce action pending, you can go to Family Court.

This legal question was provided by Avvo and answered by Jean Mahserjian, an experienced Albany Child Custody Lawyer.  This does not consent an attorney client relationship.

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